Q: Why was this page written?
A: Because it's damn hard to start out as a newbie on Genesis, and all the boobs out there passing false and unhelpful information just confuses the issue. I tried playing a newbie just recently, and all the incorrect stuff she was told by "helpful" adventurers was enough to make me want to break role and smack them in the head. I'll settle for making this page, instead.
Q: How did you find the time to do this?
A: Well, my wonderful ISP went down for a weekend, and I had no access to the internet. Since most of my creative impulses are exercised by posting to Usenet and replying to my (RL) guild mailing list, I was creatively stumped. So I whipped this little page out during the time when I usually reply to mail and such.
Q: Who are you?
A: Forward, eh? Well, to be honest I am just a player of Genesis who happens to have (to quote Wm. Steven Humphrey) "a finely hewn ham," a creative impulse, a desire to help out a game he has enjoyed for lo, these three years now, and absosmurfly no desire to code. Ok, the bit about my ham was gratuitous. If you're really interested in who I am, you can take a look at my home page. I won't be responsible for the carnage.
Q: No, no, who are you on Genesis?
A: Ah, a trickier question, that. Well, let me tell you about my second character on Genesis. I don't recall his name. I do recall that he was a one-eyed hunchbacked gnome. He was really quite insane. He kept killing mice and giving the corpses to women he met. If they showed any distaste at his gift, he would curse them in the name of his deity, Kaqzuletxpoctletlnefphstunk. Once he was asked "What guild is that?" He was incensed that the Holy Order of Kernazkeltnuajeltbtgtha was insulted by being compared to a mere guild. The questioner pointed out that a moment ago the deity's name was different. At that point, the insane little prelate called all the wrath of Kdajdfgbrsjrbgtowjram down upon the hapless woman. You see, I just typed a capital "k" and then pounded randomly on the keyboard whenever I had to type the name. It got quite fun when the non-alphanumeric characters slipped in. Unfortunately the fun ended when I forgot his password, which was immediately after I logged off, since this was precisely three years ago and it was the end of the term.
Q: Um, so who are you on Genesis?
A:
The blustery tall male human chokes in outrage. The blustery tall male human says: I am Kfarnfwalkzqewbfxletq, and you have invoked my wrath!
Q: How can I thank you for writing this page?
A: I'm sure if you're really dedicated, you'll find a way. I am human, and susceptible to most human weaknesses (especially money, since I'm an extremely poor human ;-)).
Want to comment? Be my guest.
©1997 to Michael A. Laux.